Fear or Peace?

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Well that seems logical doesn’t it? I mean really- the answer has to be Peace-right?

I mean does anyone in their right mind, sign up for fear, volunteer at it’s events or have it on their life vision boards? Of course not. But logic and my life are about as opposite as Dr Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. Why else would an intelligent ,spiritual soul like me befriend Fear on a fairly regular basis? I’ll tell you why; fear is to me as chocolate is to the chocoholic and the buzz is to the alchoholic.

Every once in awhile I just have to have it…even though I know better.

Let’s be honest in a good month I hang out with Fear a lot less than in a panicky month. In a panic riden month, like this one; where Wall Street’s crumbling, Iceland’s melting and leadership hangs in the balance; well I can’t get enough of this bad boy.

The bad news about hanging out with fear is fear never travels alone. Fear travels in a pack. It always brings it’s closest friends; desparation, insecurity, and it’ cousin doom and gloom. This three-some wreak havoc, let me tell you. Everytime I let myself venture into their neck of the woods or rather every time I open myself up to their influence they get so excited they bust a move, do the hand jibe and party like rock stars.; leaving my life in shambles.

It’s victory for Fear and his buddies whenever they turn light into darkness, possibility into dread.

Now Peace on the other hand…hangs out with a much lighter gang; Possibility, Happiness, Confidence, Love and Faith. Faith is Peace’s best friend. They are nearly inseparable, there was a rumor they were lesbians; totally untrue. When I choose peace, when I hang with her I’m much more like Gandhi than Darth Vader and a whole let less Eyoreish.

It doesn’t always feel like I have a choice. Sometimes fear feels natural, like it’s encoded within me; a part of my unconscious wiring, forever creating viruses within. But I’m too awake now to believe that balarkey-I know better. I always have choice – when it comes to my thoughts and that’s what Fear is; a way of thinking.

So as I sit here in the midst of much unknown, in this panicky month I reach for Faith and Peace and ask them to hug me tight.

Pam Hoelzle

"With" is a powerful thing


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